The Answers 

Now find out the truth!

1. Hank Marvin of The Shadows has a co-writing credit on one of the False Dots original songs.

This is true.

Hank B. Marvin wrote the guitar lick in Not All She Seems, which we still perform in our encore. Hank's son Paul was our drummer. Paul invited us to jam at his Dad's studio in Radlett. The great man joined us. He listened to Not All She Seems and then started jamming along with a jangly Hank Marvin lick. I asked him if he could show it to me. When he did he said "If ever you have a hit with that, I want a credit!". I doubt he thought the band would still be playing it 40 years later!

2. The False Dots wrote Submission by The Sex Pistols and the Pistols nicked it.

This is false. 

At a band rehearsal, a friend commented that one of our songs sounded just like Submission by the Pistols. Pete Conway replied that we'd written it when we were at school and his Dad (an Irishman involved in the building game) had played it to Johnny Rotten and his Dad who nicked it. This was a complete porkie, but the rumour did the rounds. I was still occasionally asked if it was true ten years later. We always maintained it was, but now is the time to fess up.  

3. Rog T of the False Dots once hit a Sex Pistols roadie on the head with his guitar at a band rehearsal.

This is False

An American Roadie, who claimed he'd worked for the Pistols, called Wayne Kerr (yes really, in America they don't use that as a term of abuse) auditioned for the band in 1979. He was a very unpleasant person. We believed his tale and he told us he was in the Great Rock and Roll Swindle. When we started playing a song, he started to criticise Rog T's playing. As he was 23 and Rog T was 16, he thought he could bully the band. Rog T unstrapped his guitar, hit him around the head with it and told him to 'F Off'. We later found out he was a chancer and a compulsive liar. So there is an element of truth in the story, but he wasn't a Pistols Roadie. 

4. Spotlight, by The False Dots, with Connie Abbe has had 11 million listens on the Manchester City FC website.

This is True. 

The song was used by the Manchester City FC website for the Goal of the Month show in 2011. It had over 11 million views/listens. 

5. The False Dots were the first English band to play The Pub Bastun on the Baltic Island of Aland.

This is True.

The band played at Pub Bastun on the 1982 Scandinavian tour. The venue is still going and is a centre of Metal music in the Baltic. It was the craziest gig the band ever did, with dancing on the table and three encores. 

6. The False Dots played at the Stand Stoned Starkers for Peace nudist festival on Hampstead Heath in 1983.

This is False. 

The Band were booked to play this unofficial festival, but were prevented from entering the park by a heavy Police presence. It turned very ugly when the hippies started stripping off and the Police attacked them. 

7. Rog T of the False Dots, started his career as the star of a Heinz Baked Bean Commercial in 1968.

This is true

We used some of the film footage for our video of Sunday in the seventies video (ironically the commercial was in the 60's but hey ho). 

8. Paul Hircombe RIP, bassplayer of the False Dots was on the run from the Police for a year and was mentioned on Crimewatch.

This is true

After Paul quit the band in 2008, he joined a criminal gang who stole half a million quid from motorway service station gaming machines. He was identified by the Police, went on the run, was on Crimewatch and in the papers, got arrested and spent a year in HM Prison Bellhaven. Sadly, when he was discharged he had cancer and passed away in 2012. 

9. The False Dots were featured in a scandal on the news in Sweden during our 1982 tour.

This is true

When the False Dots played at The Underground Club in Stockholm, a member of the audience sadly passed away from a drug overdose. There were also two 14 year old girls who attended and disappeared. The Swedish media decided that this terrible band had abducted them. The girls mother was on the news denouncing us. When they turned up the next day (they had stayed the weekend at a friends), the tour promoter insisted that the mother apologised to us in person on the news for "The Horrendous accusation". We arrived back on the ferry from Finland, totally unaware of the kerfuffle, to be greeted by the poor lady and the news cameras. We were quite excited to see ourselves on telly later. 

10. Rog T, guitarist of The False Dots was asked to play guitar in a version of ELO in 1988.

This is False. 

In 1988, Rog T answered an ad in Melody Maker looking for a "good looking guitarist with stage presence for paid gigs". Rog turned up with his guitar, to find that it was being held by a management company and there were dozens of other guitarists there. The letters ELO were mentioned. After about an hour of waiting around with nothing much happening, Rog and several other guitarists decided to adjourn to the pub and wait for the crowds to die down. We never returned and all got hammered. One of the other gutarists was a Rasta who invited Rog to have a jam with him at a gig the following week in a Shabang in Notting Hill. Rog turned up and ended up playing with these guys several times for £20 and all the Red Stripe he could drink. Let's just say that there was a smokey atmosphere at the club. Whether or not the audition was for ELO, no one ever really figured out. 

So how did you do?

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